What better song to ban forever than "Margaritaville"? (We're relieved that spell checker still doesn't recognize "Margaritaville" as a word.) "One trip playing on the street corners of Key West later, and his second album had Raffi-for-functioning-alcoholics tunes like 'Why Don't We Get Drunk' and 'Peanut Butter Conspiracy'."
The granddaddy of all overplayed classic rock songs, "Hotel California", gets a lifetime ban this week. "First things first: Imma brush my shoulders off because I was hatin' on The Eagles before The Dude made it cool. I'm sure bands like The Eagles and Bread are great for some. If the most delicious sandwich in the world was eagle meat on bread, I probably wouldn't eat it out of principle, and I am a food addict."
"La Grange"... you're goin' down like a mid-summer possum. "Writing about the Hot 106 is an exercise in pithiness, so you're just gonna have to trust me when I say that I could write 10,000 words about why I picked 'I'm Bad, I'm Nationwide' over 'Blue Jean Blues' or 'Just Got Paid' to replace 'La Grange'."
The Doors get their most iconic track booted this week. "Good," says everyone not still in high school or college. "(PLEASE NOTE I DID NOT REFER TO THE LYRICS AS 'POETRY')."
"NEWSFLASH! Your horse has a name: Neil Young."
Much to the chagrin of sports teams everywhere and anyone else pretending to be tough, "Back in Black" is history... man. "Bon Scott? A three-quarter turgid Pan in ill-fitting jeans. Musky, damp, cooing and begging sex."