"Is this even rock? For the life of me, I don't think so."
106 songs of classic rock hell
Classic Rock Radio – is there anything more abhorrent?
Not long ago, I was enjoying a cold beverage at a local bar when a man gave a dollar bill to a digital jukebox. I was intrigued. What would he choose? He had literally hundreds of thousands of songs at his fingertips.
From all those songs, out of all those bands, out of all those albums, the b-sides, the obscure favorites that get a nice local pub hoppin’, this guy dialed in his choice. I was overcome with the vicarious hope only a pint of beer can bring.
His selection?
‘The Joker’ by Steve Miller.
There may have been tears in my beer at that moment – I will neither confirm nor deny the reports.
This random bar guy’s musical laziness got me to thinking. It’s obvious to me there are only 106 songs that are played by Classic Rock Radio. While I don’t personally understand why anyone would want to listen to the same 106 songs for 40 years, it’s clear that I am in the minority. These songs are played for a reason: most people can’t get enough of them.
To my ears, Classic Rock Radio is an affront to creativity and music in general, and I erroneously assumed my opinions would be echoed by those who were raised on vinyl and ‘deep album cuts’ radio. Especially so, in fact. (I…just don’t get you, Baby Boomers. I give up. I’m sorry. I’ve really tried.)
Just what are these 106 songs that I love to hate and everybody else in the United States just loves? Why, they make up the Late 2 the Party Musical Hit List! ™
Yeah, this kind of hit, but Don Henley gets whacked.
(In the interest of being a problem-solver instead of just a whiner, subsequent posts will be a “Listen to This, Not That” of 106 songs that should take their place. Suggestions are welcome for all lists.)
And now, in no particular order, the Late 2 the Party Musical Hit List:
1. The Joker – Steve Miller Band
2. Mrs Robinson – Simon & Garfunkel
3. Bad to the Bone – George Thorogood
4. Won’t Get Fooled Again – The Who
5. Stairway to Heaven – Led Zeppelin
6. Back in Black – AC/DC
7. Horse with No Name – America
8. Light My Fire – The Doors
9. La Grange – ZZ Top
10. Hotel California – The Eagles
11. Margaritaville – Jimmy Buffett
12. China Grove – Doobie Brothers
13. Don’t Bring Me Down – ELO
14. Who Are You – The Who
15. Don’t Stop Believin’ – Journey
16. Freeride – Foghat
17. Miss You – Rolling Stones
18. Hey Jude – The Beatles
19. Saturday in the Park – Chicago
20. Born to Be Wild – Steppenwolf
21. Hot for Teacher – Van Halen
22. Sultans of Swing – Dire Straits
23. Time in a Bottle – Jim Croce
24. White Room – Cream
25. Goodbye Stranger – Supertramp
26. Benny and the Jets – Elton John
27. Another Brick in the Wall – Pink Floyd
28. Carry on My Wayward Son – Kansas
29. Satisfaction – Rolling Stones
30. More Than a Feeling – Boston
31. Crocodile Rock – Elton John
32. Dust in the Wind – Kansas
33. Freebird – Lynyrd Skynyrd
34. Crazy on You – Heart
35. Stuck in the Middle with You – Stealers Wheel
36. Life in the Fast Lane – The Eagles
37. Money – Pink Floyd
38. Brown Eyed Girl – Van Morrison
39. You Really Got Me – The Kinks
40. You Really Got Me – Van Halen
41. One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer – George Thorogood
42. Old Time Rock and Roll – Bob Seger
43. Wheel in the Sky – Journey
44. American Pie – Don McLean
45. Bad Company – Bad Company
46. Night Moves – Bob Seger
47. Sweet Home Alabama – Lynyrd Skynyrd
48. Born to Run – Bruce Springsteen
49. Don’t Fear the Reaper – Blue Oyster Cult
50. Tush – ZZ Top
51. Imagine – John Lennon
52. Get Back – The Beatles
53. Crazy Train – Ozzy Osbourne
54. Heartbreaker/Livin’ Lovin’ Maid – Led Zeppelin
55. Cum on Feel the Noize – Quiet Riot
56. We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions – Queen
57. Heart of Gold – Neil Young
58. Here I Go Again – Whitesnake
59. Feels like the First Time – Foreigner
60. Piano Man – Billy Joel
61. Layla – Derek and the Dominoes
62. Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door – Guns ‘n’ Roses
63. Like a Rolling Stone – Bob Dylan
64. Start Me Up – Rolling Stones
65. Message in a Bottle – Police
66. Radar Love – Golden Earring
67. Fooling Yourself – Styx
68. Dude Looks like a Lady – Aerosmith
69. Just What I Needed – The Cars
70. Gimme Three Steps – Lynryd Skynyrd
71. You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet – Bachman Turner Overdrive
72. Lonely is the Night – Billy Squier
73. Dirty Deeds, Done Dirt Cheap – AC/DC
74. You’re My Best Friend – Queen
75. Take it Easy – The Eagles
76. Somebody to Love – Queen
77. Take the Long Way Home – Supertramp
78. Dream Weaver – Gary Wright
79. Pour Some Sugar on Me – Def Leppard
80. White Wedding – Billy Idol
81. Refugee – Tom Petty
82. Bang a Gong – T Rex
83. Runnin’ with the Devil – Van Halen
84. I Want You to Want Me – Cheap Trick
85. Magic Carpet Ride – Steppenwolf
86. Already Gone – The Eagles
87. Can’t Get Enough – Bad Company
88. Go Your Own Way – Fleetwood Mac
89. Summer of ’69 – Bryan Adams
90. It’s Only Rock ‘n’ Roll – Rolling Stones
91. Walk This Way – Aerosmith
92. Running on Empty – Jackson Browne
93. Come Sail Away – Styx
94. Suzy Q – Credence Clearwater Revival
95. Southern Man – Neil Young
96. Turn the Page – Bob Seger
97. Rebel Yell – Billy Idol
98. Don’t Stop – Fleetwood Mac
99. School’s Out – Alice Cooper
100. Pink Houses – John Mellencamp
101. Comfortably Numb – Pink Floyd
102. I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll – Joan Jett
103. The Boys Are Back in Town – Thin Lizzy
104. Takin’ Care of Business – Bachman Turner Overdrive
105. Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For – U2
106. I Can’t Drive 55 – Sammy Hagar
BONUS: 107. Band on the Run – Paul McCartney & Wings
BONUS: 108. Tom Sawyer – Rush
BONUS: 109. Touch of Grey – Grateful Dead
Yesterday i spent 300 bucks for platinium roulette system
, i hope that i will make my first $$$ online